What Do I Do About My Jealous Cat Towards My Spouse?
Posted by: Alan in Cat Health Problem, tags: About, Jealous, Spouse, Towards, What
My 9 year old female cat has already been to the vet and given a clean bill of health. So this is not a medical problem. She initially was very loving towards my spouse when he first arrived. Lately, she has been lashing out at the invasion of her nest. She growls and hisses at my spouse and very recently has been peeing in random places. Not enough pee where she is deliberately going to the bathroom, but more is SO anxious just pees a bit where ever she is at that moment he may, for example, walk in the door. We’ve made efforts such as: I call her into the main living area while my spouse sits quietly. she will slowly move into the room, but the second he makes a peep, she is often gone like a shot. He gives her treats and she is fine for a few minutes and then starts in with the growling again. I’m at a lose and not sure what to do. if you have any suggestions, I’m all ears. sincerely, thanks very much!
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November 24th, 2009 at 3:46 pm
That looks to me like a case of cat jealousy. She has gotten used to your domestic situation, and she resents the change. The good side of the situation is that cats will addapt. Just hang in there, be yourself, and the cat will make the change. Do NOT go out of your way to make changes, this will only make her more upst.
November 24th, 2009 at 8:57 pm
It will probably take time. I was never a cat person before marriage. I’m lucky that our cat was never jealous, just very people-shy. It took a week-long moving trip from California to here, plus about six weeks, before our Hobbes became totally comfortable with my presence. (Ironically, now he’s VERY social, and is happy to meet anyone who comes into our house. My wife tells me before we got married, he would do nothing but hide whenever anyone else was in her apartment. And, in fact, he did that until he got to know me.)
Anyway, one suggestion that might work (if you have feeding times with wet food): Let your cat get hungry – NOT starving, just wait like a half hour to forty-five minutes past her normal feeding time. Then let your husband open the can and put it there. Then he sits about ten feet away until she comes to eat, if possible. Do this for a few days and let her adjust into the idea that your hubby now feeds her. Hopefully she’ll make the connection that the one who feeds her is probably OK.
Good luck to you!
November 24th, 2009 at 10:50 pm
It sounds like the cat can sense that your spouse doesn’t care for her. Almost anxious with him around rather then jealous. Our cat is jealous. She will squeeze in between us at night or on the couch if we’re cuddling.
I suggest finding out how your spouse really feels bout your cat. Perhaps he could bring her favorite treat? Wet catfood or catnip toy? That might help??
November 25th, 2009 at 4:41 am
how does he treat her when your not around?
November 25th, 2009 at 7:21 am
Meet Sneakers. If you want to you can hop over to MySpace where I posted a video of my wife’s cat, Sneakers. It’s at http://www.myspace.com/jimbauer – just click on ‘videos’ and it’ll take you there. You can also read a comical blog I wrote on my experience with the cat. Believe me, it was no picnic.
Anyway, I had exactly the same problem when my wife moved in (we weren’t married then), and it got so bad it almost cost us our marriage. I was ready to lay down the law. Either the cat goes or I do.
Anyway, we’re both still here and things have improved over time. My guess here is that the cat will eventually adapt. It may never be a loving relationship (Sneakers and I are okay when the wife is around, but no good when she’s not), but it WILL get better.http://www.springboardblog.blogspot.com
November 25th, 2009 at 8:39 am
I’d say get rid of the spouse by any means necessary since I’m assuming the cat was there first. Cats have like a sixth sense about people. He’s probably a bad person and she’s just trying to save you from him. You should probably thank her once he’s gone. Get her some treats or something nice
November 25th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
jealousy. thats what it is. get a Feliway plug-in. it will help her relax. it stops cat aggression and anxiety.
also, give her extra attention when he isn’t there to show her that she is still loved.